You want the truth?

The Ray Rice story has been generating a bunch of conversations in my business this past week. The situation leads me to believe all too often we women are being miss-represented. I've been working in sports media since the spring of 1988. I've run into a lot of people - hundreds who have supported a woman in sports and thousands who have not. My dreams and goals are still in place; they've been adjusted at times, but they're mine and alive. Over the last 25+ years witnessing the way women have been treated in this business has been interesting and thought provoking. You may or may not agree with my theories. For sooooooo many years, boys are brought up in society to be stronger, more physical and tougher than girls. In sports, it's been the same with a disturbing and underlying twist. When boys begin sports they are given female examples, moms, sisters, grandmas, aunts, teachers and cousins. As boys get to a certain age those females are still there, but then you bring in the cheerleaders, which are 95% female. Then as the boys grow into their chosen sports, add into the equation girlfriends, then groupies, strippers, prostitutes and wives. For a majority of their athletic careers the male species doesn't see females in coaching unless it's in girls’ sports. The examples we're offering boys along the way from middle school forward are already programmed into their brains to be female family members or cheerleaders. TV, magazines, print ads, billboards, commercials, etc. for the most part, use women as sexy selling points for products and lifestyles. Let's be straight and honest...sex sells! The Ray Rice story and his little two game suspension illustrates the NFL's ideas that drug violations are more severe than the physical abuse of women. This is outrageous and a total joke! You may not agree with me, but until we teach young male athletes that women are more than cheerleaders, groupies, strippers, or waitresses wearing tight tank tops and tiny orange shorts, women will still find it difficult to truly, consistently and legitimately be accepted into the world of sports. Don't get me wrong; I realize women are "okay" on the TV sidelines and in the studios. This is acceptable because we, the viewing public can "see" them. But, that doesn't mean the majority of the sports viewing population (men) want to hear what these females have to say. As long as we "sell" and objectify women as a commodity - sexy, thin, or perfect on the outside, we'll never have a level playing field. We women are not mad at society; we're not resentful, we'd just like to see our representation evolve into a better place for all of us to excel, fulfill our goals and attain our dreams. I'm pretty sure most major sports leagues in this country have rookie symposiums teaching the 20-22 year old athletes about finances, behavior, and media training. I'm curious if there's anything in these seminars about how to respect women. I hope so. Is that asking too much? Of course, when we do create the life we want and make progress we can still be sexy and beautiful, and we'd like to be. We just don't want that to be the reason we succeed. Let's stop objectifying females. I assure you, things will change for the better. It's a visual world, but that's not all it is.